I’m a Self Published Author, Now What?

I couldn’t be happier that I’ve crossed the finish line and actually finished my book and saw it all the way through to publication. It’s mind blowing for me, since this is my debut novel and I’ve only dreamed I’d ever do something like this. But truly, getting the book published doesn’t mean I’m done with the book. Actually, you are never really done.

After the Fire, took me almost four years to the exact date from the infancy of the novel, until I pushed publish on the website for Kindle Direct Publishing, when I created both my eBook and paperback versions. You can find my Author Central Page here, on Amazon. If you’ve followed along with me on this blog from the beginning, you understand I had to learn a lot to get to this point. I imagine my next book will take less than half that time since I now understand the industry much better, but the thing with self publishing is you are everyone! I’m the publicist, marketing director, and secretary. Still, it’s very exciting work.

My shipment of Advance Reader Copies

I’ve heard, “Now you can make money! Remember us little people when you are rich and famous!” But in reality, there are so many people on the planet every day publishing books, the rich and famous part are few and far between. I’d just like to pay the bills with my writing. That would make me very happy. But currently, my reality is that just publishing the book set me back quite a bit of dough! So marketing is the next very important thing. By sharing my book info, all of you are helping me with that.

I consider myself successful because I accomplished my goal of getting published. If I am to be financially successful, I will need to be in the black and as of now, I most definitely am not. But my husband always says, “If it were easy, everyone would do it.” He’s right. It’s not and I still did it! After the Fire, is doing pretty darn good for just being released, (averaging 5 stars in the reviews), and it’s because I’ve worked hard and I DO have a good product. I’m very grateful you wonderful people have believed in me.

The above shots are shared photos from people who have purchased my book and sent their new arrival pics to Facebook for everyone to see. I have several more and will be sharing more each blog post. I cannot tell you how much it warms my heart to see these, so please, KEEP SHARING. These are from Coree, Anthony, and Becky in the above three. Thank you guys.

I am going to have an AP announcement locally soon, as well as start the process of getting my books carried in northern California indie bookstores. These things take time and since I’m still at my full time day job as public school librarian, I get delayed periodically. But if you’d like to help, share my content with your friends. Share this blog, comment on this blog, share to social media my status when you see it, and it ALWAYS HELPS!

Follow me on Instagram @pattidiener, on Facebook at Patti Diener, and on Twitter @pattidiener. If you want to comment on this post, please share something about the book if you’ve read it already. If you haven’t, that’s ok. I welcome your feedback.

Remember, After the Fire, makes a great Christmas gift. You can order on Amazon here. There is a holiday element in the book so the timing is perfect for curling up in front of a fire and having a cup of coffee, tea, or glass of wine. This romance novel is the first of many to come from me, and if you continue to follow along, I will post my first chapter of a new novel in early 2020.

Thank you all for reading. Thank you all for your support.

The Book Cover Reveal for AFTER THE FIRE!

It’s only been four years, but it seems like it’s been a decade since I started this project. From the burning desire to write this story, to my interview process, and developing my characters, it’s all been a labor of love. The long days and nights of editing, the re-editing, (my least favorite part, but it helped me grow as a writer), and the fantastic people I met along the way all helped to teach me about the publishing industry. HERE IT IS!

I have this wonderful book cover, designed by Chrissy at Damonza, that I am totally in love with. She was patient and kind as I sent back several other options for covers. She never let me down when I became specific about the models. After much back and forth, we chose this one to be the cover for my debut novel, After the Fire.

People ask me how I found my book cover designer and I have to tell the truth. I have followed a very inspirational person for a few years named Kristen Martin. She is a best selling author and creative entrepreneur who helps new authors to navigate the self publishing world. She is the one who suggested Damonza and when someone as successful as she is recommended this company, I thought it was worth looking into. It was a great idea and I am very happy I did.

One of my mentors, Kristen Martin

If you are a writer or interested in starting a business that requires you become more disciplined with your time management, she’s your gal. It’s been hard on me trying to find the time to write my book while working a full time job. Even harder still, when I decided to self-publish my book. But I’m not sorry I made that choice now. It’s been very educational and I love the work.

So what’s next? MARKETING! I have the wonderfully daunting task of going out and about to find indie bookstores that will want to carry my book. I have to organize some kind of press release, and talk y’all into promoting the heck out of this beautiful love story that came out of The Valley Fire, here in Lake County.

If you want to help, you can share this post. Share, share, share! Share my blog posts, share my social media posts, and use the hashtag #AFTERTHEFIRE. Start a new craze using #AFTERTHEFIRE! For any of you who don’t understand how my book could be about the Valley Fire and be a love story, please click here to read how this all came to be.

I want to thank you all for your continued support. I am very excited to say that now with both my books formatting done and book covers complete, I can upload my book to Amazon this weekend and order my Advance Reader Copies, (ARC’s) to proof the paperback in print, and also get some reviews. As soon as I see that everything prints fine and there are not errors, within days my book will be available for purchase. YAY!

Stay tuned readers! This has been a wild ride.

*Photo of Kristen Martin, by Kristen Martin

The Print Date Is Near / After The Fire, soon to be released

The much awaited novel by Patti Diener, (well if you’ve been following me it’s been much awaited), will be available for purchase this Fall. The four long years since the day the horrific Valley Fire tragically altered the lives of citizens of Lake County, California, will soon have a love story to show for it. It is my gift to my community.

My book, After the fire, will be released on Amazon soon and I have to tell you, it’s been both exhausting and exhilarating. From the beginning I was certain I would publish traditionally and I did pursue that route. You know, get an agent, have a publishing house pick up my book and I sign a wonderful contract. Well when I set a timeline for myself to find the right agent to represent me once the manuscript was finally fully edited, polished, and shined, I ended up with the decision to self publish.

My writing desk

I have the book cover done, the formatting is nearly done, (that’s where you have the written words formatted to fit the size of your paperback and e-book), and once it’s complete, all I have to do is upload it to Kindle Direct Publishing, then BAM! Within a few days of the upload, you can buy my book in either form.

I am going to do a big reveal on the book cover as soon as the formatting is complete. I say this because I purchased a package deal from the company that did both the cover and formatting for one price, and since I don’t technically own the cover until it’s paid in full, I don’t want to show it online. But within about a week or so, that too should be ready.

I cannot tell you how anxious I am to share with the world what I completed. It is pretty scary though too. What if people hate it? I thought about that a few times… Ok, a lot of times. But still, I realized that no matter what, I WROTE A BOOK! I started it and finished it, and regardless of my fears, I know this was a learning experience in my writing journey, and I took you all along with me for the ride. It was the only thing I could think about after so much happened in our county, and writing a love story for all of us, and showcasing what a unique and wonderful community we live in, for the rest of the world to read about…well that is good enough reason for me.

So be on the look out for that book cover. Tell your friends about AFTER THE FIRE. I am going to be stalking the indie book stores within a 100 mile radius of Lake County, to see if they will carry my book in their stores. Send me good vibes for a successful outcome on that front, and you can help by sharing my blog on social media. Use the hashtag #AFTERTHEFIRE when talking about it. I love you all for your support.

Patti Diener Self Publishing 101: Do This Before Formatting

Just when you think you’ve got a handle on everything and that all the pieces are in place, a snag holds you up. Be prepared for set backs!

I finally had the money to begin my process for formatting the book and getting the cover design for both e-book and paperback done by this really reputable company. I’d filled out all the required information and believed that by having my completed manuscript, having my title page, dedication page, and acknowledgements all ready to go, that all I had to do was upload this to them and they would handle the rest.

Here’s what I wasn’t ready for. Even though I paid for my copyright back in June, it’s still not ready. I don’t have it yet. When I upload my manuscript the company NEEDS my copyright page in order to format the book. I also found out it could take anywhere from one to four months to get it. Four months? That cannot happen! UGH! It’s already been six weeks so I’m hopeful to hear from them any day.

I went to Mendocino for my annual writing trip and continued creating my second novel because I thought I had everything I needed done for AFTER THE FIRE. In fact I had, but I really wish now I’d gotten my copyright done a few months before I did. Since at the time of my trip, I was unaware I’d kind of screwed myself, I wasn’t fretting about the situation so I really got into a groove of writing bliss. I suppose it was for the best I only just found out since there’s nothing to be done about it now anyway but wait.

At least the design team can still get the cover done for me. I am anxiously waiting to see the two designs they come up with and I am to choose one to work with that they will continue to edit until I am completely satisfied. This creative aspect of marketing excites me. They have designed tons of very beautiful and professional book covers so I’ve no doubt I’ll be pleased. Still the waiting is keeping me on pins and needles with anticipation.

As soon as I get a fully edited copy of my book’s cover I will share it with you all so you will know what to look out for when my book hits the shelves and Kindle Direct Publishing. I appreciate any and all support you’ve shown for my endeavor. If you’d like to help me create a buzz, you can share this post with all your friends on social media, and use the hashtag #AFTERTHEFIRE.

Thank you all so much for the interest you’ve taken in me and my book. I’ll keep you posted.

Copyright Success

I have to tell you that when I logged onto the government website with the intention of copyrighting my romance novel, I was about to put my head through a wall. You know that feeling when you can actually feel the blood whisking throughout your body, and your eyes narrow, you start to feel a tightening within your chest and throat, and you clench your teeth? Yeah, that was me. There are SO MANY THINGS TO NAVIGATE!

Being a librarian, I think of myself as fairly tech savvy. I can usually figure out how to maneuver through any website and figure out what to do and reach my goal. Well the website I was on for copyright.gov was NOT at all helpful. Then I realized why…

I WAS ON THE WRONG WEBSITE! If you are trying to get your work protected through copyright, you need to go to ECO.copyright.gov and then log onto Youtube. I found the absolute best tutorial there.

Alessandra Torre’s amazing video

What I did that was super helpful, was after finding Alessandra Torre’s fantastic tutorial on Youtube, I had the video open on one tab, and the ECO.copyright.gov open on another tab and would watch a little of the video, pause, then go to the copyright website and do what I learned. I did this step-by-step!

Self publishing for the first time by yourself is really daunting. There are so many steps that you have to do and in order no less. Something else I found out is about the ISBN numbers. You know, the numbers above the barcode on the back of the books you buy? Well, I thought when I bought the ISBN, (International Standard Book Number), that it came with the barcode. NOPE! You have to purchase the barcode separately. UGH!

Image result for of course gif
Giphy

But all in all, I am still super excited to be on this journey. I am buying my ISBN numbers this week. I was successful in getting my copyright for After The Fire, and next on the check list is getting my book cover designed and formatting done. These things will be done by the same company so that’s a load off my mind. They will be doing it for both ebook and paperback. More on that with my next blog post.

Thanks to everyone for supporting me and I promise to keep you all in the loop for the next steps with my self publishing project. Hopefully I will be able to give you all a sneak peek at the book cover design very soon. My goal is to have the book available by Christmas this year. Fingers crossed.

Happy reading!

Self Publishing Here I Come!

On a November weekend in 2015, I sat at my hotel desk in Fort Bragg, California, and started to write a short story for a contest. It had to be something important to me. Something that would grip me enough that I would write passionately about it. Unfortunately, I couldn’t get the recent tragic fire from my community out of my mind. Then it hit me! I had to write something for the people of my community that would lift their spirits. I had to tell their stories. I decided to write a love story for my people, and give it a happy ending. That’s what we all felt we needed so desperately, after the Valley Fire, in Lake County, California.

It’s been three and a half years. I have written this story and it morphed into a full blown romance novel of 80,500 words, (so much for a short story), and it’s my debut novel as an author. After going to several conferences, been to writing classes, I’ve joined a writing group, and edited this book three times, including had it professionally edited by a romance genre editor, IT’S DONE!

There simply isn’t anything more I can do to this story because it’s a good story! Some have said it’s a very special story, and I am ready to share it with the world. But sadly, I cannot find an agent that is willing to give it a chance because it’s different. One even said I’m possibly trying to, “do too much with the story.” Well, I have integrated real life stories into my romance novel, things that actually happened to folks because of this fire. I wasn’t willing to edit these stories out of the book. They drive the story and they make the situation folks were going through REAL,…because it was.

If you remember the movie, The Titanic, my characters are to The Valley Fire, what Jack and Rose were to The Titanic. I have a central love story that is set in the aftermath of The Valley Fire. Remove the fire stories, and you just have any run-of-the-mill love story. It’s no longer special. I’d not categorize it as trying to do too much with the story. I’d say adding the fire stories is not only WHY I wrote the book, but it gives the story it’s individuality. After all, aren’t agents and publishing houses always looking for a fresh, new story? So why on Earth, would I try to fit into some cookie cutter mold for romance novels?

Me when I decided I was on my own.

So when it hit me, and I realized I was going to have to either work the system for possibly years trying to convince some agent and publishing house to print my book, (anything unconventional agents shy away from because they need to sell it before they make money), or I could do it myself. Guess which won out? I’m going to do it myself!

This means creating a publishing company, a business account, copy writing it myself, establishing the ISBN# and formatting, book cover design, pricing, marketing, and setting up an account with printing company, (such as Amazon), and all the costs that go with this. It’s pretty daunting, but I believe I’m up for the task. It’s just expensive.

I realize I will most likely make mistakes. I’m going to try not to but I’m certain after I’m done I will say things like, “I wish I’d not done X,Y,Z.” But with research, friends that have already done it, and keeping in close contact with my local indie book stores, I’m sure I can sell this book. I already have folks like you, waiting to read it.

So thank you for following along with my endeavor and you might be interested to know, that I’m already well into another book. One that will be the first in a three book series. More on that to come.

So now you are caught up. I’m going to make it my mission to get this book on the shelves of book stores, and Kindle ready through Amazon. Keep reading, and keep watching for a book called AFTER THE FIRE. There will no doubt be a lot I still need to do before getting it to a store, (or Kindle), near you, but at least now I know what my plan is. Self publishing.

Warm regards and happy reading.

*Photos by me, Patti Diener

Romance Novelist Seeks Literary Agent / It’s a Long Process

Quirky, (often caffeinated or soaked in wine), writer of romance, and or, women’s fiction, seeks literary agent with ability to counsel, laugh with, and get her book published sometime before all her hair falls out from stress! Must like chocolate, (or just give me a box). It’s been three years folks! I want the book in print.

I’ve learned a lot about myself while going through this journey to get my book published. I’ve become more patient than I ever realized I’d have to be. I’ve also found out just how much I really didn’t know. Now that I’ve studied the industry and spent lots of money on conferences, classes, and found my own writing process, I’m certain my next book (already in the works) will go a bit smoother…. Alas, I still need an agent.

Since I was in the fifth grade, I’ve dreamed of being a novelist. Can one really call themselves a novelist if they’ve written a book, actually finished the entire manuscript, but haven’t been published? I think not. It’s still incomplete, if it’s not available for everyone to read. I am a writer,though. That is for certain. A writer writes, no matter what the circumstances. I cannot fathom a life without writing. So that’s something I guess.

Someone told me the other day, “Don’t forget us when you are rich and famous.” I laughed. I don’t even care about that part, because let’s be honest, most writers do NOT become either. It’s simply inside of us and has to come out. It’s like rain water for plants. We’d wither without writing.

The creative process of writing, (not to be confused with editing, which I hate), is something like magic. I go into a trance-like mode where my mind is where ever the writing is. I see it, smell it, feel it, and taste it. I actually live in the moment of that particular writing piece and barely acknowledge my true surroundings. God, I love it when that happens.

But here I still am, unpublished, and it feels somewhat of a failure. Not that the book has failed, because it hasn’t even been given the chance, but at my age, I’d have thought I’d have had at least one book published by now. Life just sort of happened, and it didn’t take me to the place where I could write or concentrate on my writing until this time. Practice more patience.

So I will keep at it. Something new I’m trying is to pursue a male agent. Yes, who knew men wanted to represent the romance genre, but as it turns out, I’ve found a few that sound like they would be a great fit! I’m even pretty hopeful because of what they might bring to the table in perspective. New horizons!

Thanks for being in my corner, and waiting as patiently as you all have for AFTER THE FIRE, to come out. As I’ve promised, if I do not find just the right agent, I will self publish, but yikes! I’d really rather not go it alone out there. An agent would be my first choice.

Have a lovely rest of your Sunday and as always, happy reading.

*The second picture with laptop was taken from Google Images

Submitting Your Manuscript To An Agent Takes Courage

There is nothing more terrifying than the moment after you click the SUBMIT BUTTON, when sending off your baby, your manuscript, to a literary agent. That’s when all the tormenting questions in your head begin.

Did I edit enough? Did I polish it until it shined? Did I cut the right parts? Will she like my style? Is my story intriguing enough? Am I good enough?

The thing about submitting is you never know the answer to these questions but if you don’t take a chance, if you don’t jump off into the deep end of the pool, you will never swim, darling.

To paraphrase something a literary agent said to a sea of anxious writers at the San Francisco Writers Conference, they are looking for writers to work with. They need stories to sell, so agents need writers as much as writers need agents. Sometimes even more, because today in the world of publishing, an author can self publish without using an agent at all. So that being said, if you seek the road to traditional publishing, just keeping that in mind and it helps tremendously.

Still you cannot just pick an agent out of a hat and hope for the best. It’s crucial to take your time to find an agent that is interested in your genre. Three words; DO YOUR RESEARCH. Even if the agent has in their bio that they work with the genre your manuscript falls under, you still need to find out if they are currently taking submissions or if they are flooded in that particular category at the time you will be submitting.

I tell you, the number one thing that has helped me throughout my writing process, and my journey to traditional publishing, is going to conferences. In the last three years, I’ve gone to three conferences, (twice to the San Francisco Writers Conference, and once to the Redwood Writers Conference). That is where you will meet folks from all avenues of the writing world, and from all over the world. Collaborating with these people will help you to hone your skills and most importantly, help you decide what you plan to do with your writing.

Another great way to improve your writing, and to glean wonderful ideas, is to join a writing group. Listening to others and asking advice, sharing stories and using prompts to dig deeper into yourself, have all been very beneficial to me. Besides, you will never feel more camaraderie than when surrounded by other writers. It’s like a safety net for your vulnerable emotions before you attempt to share with the public. Baby steps to taking that leap of faith, (like into the deep end).

I am currently waiting to hear back from one particular agent, but will be submitting to another this weekend. I hope to get my manuscript out to ten agents within the next few weeks, but I started with my best bet and hope first, because she has had the most interest in it. She is also the one that has given me advice and I’ve built up a relationship with her that makes me feel comfortable enough to think, hey I like this gal and can see myself working with her. Personalities mean a lot if you plan to be working intimately with someone on a project as personal as your book!

For information about my book, AFTER THE FIRE, click the link here, and find out what started this whole journey. I’ve been blogging about it since I started my book in November 2015, right after the Valley Fire, in Lake County, California. Consequently, when I started writing, our horrific experience was one of the worst California had ever seen. Sadly, since then, there have been fires that were worse in terms of property and life lost. My heart goes out to all of those who have suffered from these terrible tragedies. 

Thanks for reading and I will keep you all posted on my progress.

Wishing you all well.

*Photos by Patti Diener

Read More of After The Fire

Here is the final first 15 pages of my book. I say final, but who knows what happens if a traditional publishing house buys it. Will they ask me to change it? I really hope not because I’ve given blood, sweat, and tears to bring my book to where it is. Truth is, you never know what you will have to fight for contractually when it comes to your work. I wrote it, had a friend read it, changed and edited it, sent it to a professional editor, had to add a point of view and major edits, then final edits from the second run through with my editor. NOW… I am nearly ready to submit to agents but still am editing the final pages. You can read the beginning though. Please comment on the blog at the end, and let me know how you like it thus far. I need the feedback. Remember, I’m submitting it to 10 agents by the first of November.

Happy Reading My Friends.

After The Fire

Chapter One

Arrival

           “Where do you go, when there is nowhere to go?”

            Gabriel read the words from the crisp pages of his complimentary newspaper left outside his hotel room door. That was all he read before tossing it onto the unmade bed and rushing to work that morning. Returning now to the quiet room, he surveyed the mess he’d left, and considered the paper once more, the headlines still talking of the tragic fire from a few months ago. A heavy sigh, he squinted his eyes, folded it in half, then tossed it unread onto the cheap hotel desk. Too much to think about.

      Gabriel was in a foul mood. The excavating company he worked for brought him to this rural community in northern California, to clean up after the Valley Fire swept through and destroyed over one thousand homes. It wasn’t the work that was upsetting. It was the fact that it was the holidays, and that particular time of year always tore at his heart. He thought being in a strange place would distract him. The truth was it made him feel more alone than ever.

The company was putting them up in the only large hotel chain in the area. The Best Western was the tallest building in the small town of Clearlake, reaching four stories high. Being the foreman, he didn’t have to share a room with other guys. He was alone and able to sulk all he wanted.

Three years earlier, it had been raining that Christmas Eve, and it was all over before Gabe even knew what hit them. The papers said the multi-car pileup on the freeway was caused by poor weather conditions, limited visibility, and high speeds. Gabe suffered his share of injuries, a fractured  arm, clavicle, ribs, and punctured lung, but Shelly’s side of the car was what took most of the hit. The doctors said she died instantly.

Once the casts were off, Gabe went to work. It was the only reason he had to get out of bed.

Coming to Lake County, to help rebuild the lives of so many that lost everything in the Valley Fire, he thought would lift his spirits. Being lonely around the holidays was just something he couldn’t shake. This particular Friday the thought of driving hours back to his apartment just didn’t sound like it would help so he stayed at the hotel while the rest of the guys went home. Maybe if he had a dog or something, he would have a reason to go, but alone here or there was still alone.

After showering and shaving, Gabe decided to head downstairs to grab a burger and a few beers. Maybe watch some football on the TV, if it was on. To his surprise, the small town bar was slammed and lively. There were loads of people shooting pool, watching the game, and talking loudly over the jukebox.

There was one lone seat at the far left of the bar, furthest away from the television, but closest to the kitchen entry. He could smell the aroma of cooking onions, and sizzling beef. Suddenly he was famished.

“What’s your pleasure my man?” The gentleman taking Gabe’s order had deep dimples that accompanied a kind smile.

“Oh, a Coors Light please, and can I order food?”

“Of course. Do you need a menu or can I make a suggestion?” the bartender asked.

“Um…well, sure. What do you recommend?”

“Well, the chicken fried steak is always good, but my personal Friday Night fav is a thick, juicy burger with sautéed onions. We have shoestring fries that go great with it too.”

Gabriel thought the guy read his mind and quickly agreed to the burger and fries. The cheery bartender winked at him and said he’d place the order right away. The long-neck bottle of Coors Light was placed in front of Gabe as the bartender disappeared into the kitchen.

The Stanford game was on the TV but the sound of Bruno Mars was blaring out from the jukebox. Gabe swiveled his barstool around to survey the room while taking a long swig off his beer. The group was mostly his age or younger.

At thirty-three, Gabe was an old soul. He never was a big partier and preferred more intimate gatherings. But somehow, being swallowed up in a crowd right now was comforting. It was easier than being back in the city, with Shelly’s and his friends feeling sorry for him. Nobody knew him here, or his story, and that’s the way he liked it.

The woman bartender appeared in front of Gabe, placing his plated burger in front of him along with a bottle of ketchup. She gave him a brief smile and quickly walked away to grab a chilled wine glass and a bottle of chardonnay to pour for another customer.

Just as the dimpled bartender promised, the burger was exactly what Gabe needed. The crisp, salty fries were cooked to perfection and he washed it all down with the beer. Before he could even ask for another, the guy just appeared in front of Gabe with a knowing look.

“Ready for another cold one?” The bartender leaned over to grab Gabe’s empty bottle.

“Yeah, you have great timing,” Gabe said.

As the bartender reached into a refrigerator under the counter, Gabe took a better look at him. The guy seemed a little older than he was with slightly weathered good looks. His light brown hair was a little long, and they were about the same height. His deep-set, dark eyes smiled just like his dimples. Although he was tanned, somehow, Gabe knew it wasn’t from being on the lake a lot. This guy seemed more like the outdoorsy, working kind of guy, like himself. That and his hands looked rough like his own. This guy didn’t spend all his time inside bartending that was for sure.

“So, what do you do?” Gabe asked as he took a swig of beer.

“Well right now, I’m your friendly neighborhood bartender. But I dabble in many fields. How about you?” the bartender asked.

“I’m here with the contractors for the fire clean up. I’m staying at the hotel.”

“I’m surprised you didn’t head out this evening like the others then. Don’t feel like going home for the weekend?” he asked.

“Let’s just say, I can be just as occupied here as there.” Gabe replied, having another pull on his bottle.

“Well, it’s a pleasure having you here. I know there are a lot of folks really grateful for any help speeding up the recovery process. That fire really kicked this community’s ass. Folks need hope, ya know?” The bartender got distracted by something and Gabriel turned on his barstool to see what was going on.

Three women were heading into the bar. The first was a lovely blonde with typically over-highlighted hair, jeans and heels. The next was a brunette in a long-sleeved dress and high-heeled boots. Finally, somewhat behind and entering more slowly, was a thin, honey haired girl with her head down. She wore simple jeans, tennis shoes, and a flannel shirt with a tank-top under it. When she looked up in the direction of her friends, her light green eyes were piercing, and something caught in Gabe’s chest. He couldn’t take his eyes off her.

“You, uh…Ok there my friend?” the bartender was asking.

Gabriel realized he hadn’t heard a word the guy had said. His focus was on the green-eyed girl.

“Sorry, man. No, I’m just fine, thanks,” Gabe smiled somewhat embarrassed.

“It’s understandable. I’m guilty of the same distractions,” the bartender said while staring in the girl’s direction himself. A dark shadow fell over the face of his otherwise cheerful bartender. “If you will excuse me, I need to grab some stuff, but I will be back,” and he disappeared down the hallway.

When Gabe returned his attention back to the girls, he saw a waitress over taking their orders. He didn’t want to seem too obvious with his intrigue, so he turned his barstool sideways to watch the TV screen and pretend to be interested in the game.

Gabe hadn’t dated or even thought of dating anyone since Shelly. He just didn’t have the heart to let go of the past yet, despite all their friends trying to set him up. He insisted it was too soon and he wasn’t ready to even think about it.

He snuck another glance in her direction. She looked like he felt, when HE was with his friends. Distracted, and uncomfortable, but trying to go along with the facade of the evening, she sipped her wine and looked around the room.

Suddenly, the girl locked eyes with Gabe and he felt a rush of heat flush his chest and face. She’d caught him looking. Gabe tried to slowly, casually turn his barstool back towards the TV.

“Be careful with that one,” the bartender said pulling Gabriel from his fog.

“What are you talking about?” Gabe pretended. He wasn’t ready to admit to himself that he felt interested in a woman, much less admit it to anyone else.

“She’s fragile. Don’t give it another thought unless you can respect that about her.”

Gabriel looked into the bartender’s eyes. He was dead serious.

“Not that I’m interested, but I take it you know her.”

“Everyone does,” he said. “She’s as local as it gets. But she’s had her fair share of hard knocks so, that’s why the warning.”

“Broken heart or…” Gabe’s question was left hanging in the air as the bartender stared at her pondering a response.

“More like shattered. She’s not recovered. Oh, she puts on a brave face, but… Anyway, it will take a very special guy for her to ever trust again,” and the bartender turned and started washing dishes.

Gabe drank more of his beer and turned his stool back to look towards the girl’s table. The green-eyed girl was shyly glancing towards Gabe periodically but then turned her chair to face her friends more directly. Gabe got the hint.

“Must have been some stupid guy to hurt a girl like that,” Gabe said in the bartender’s direction. “I have never been the player some guys are. I know something real when I have it. And anyway, who’s got the time for that?” and he finished off the last of his fries.

The friendly bartender turned and gave a small smile to Gabe, as he took the empty plate away and wiped the counter. “It’s too bad not more people had the same outlook as you. Truth is my friend, that most folks are always looking for the next best thing. Nobody is ever quite satisfied with what they have. Especially if things get rough, that’s when the weak give up.”

“So that’s what happened? Some guy left her in hard times?” Gabe asked.

The face of the bartender seemed pained at the question and soon Gabriel was sorry he asked. It was beginning to look like there was more to this story than the bartender had first let on and Gabe immediately felt like he should retract any further questioning.

“Hey, I don’t mean to pry, you don’t need to answer that. It’s really none of my business,” Gabe offered.

The bartender gave a forced laugh, “No, no. It’s quite alright. We all move on and so will she, but everyone here kind of watches out for her. Just so you know,” and he winked at Gabe then walked back into the kitchen with the plate.

He knew he shouldn’t be, but Gabe was now more intrigued than ever about this green-eyed beauty. It seemed so unfair that something as gentle as she could have gone through such trauma. And even though he was always missing Shelly, Gabriel had a yearning to get to know this girl. Approaching her in a bar was NOT the thing to do though, and Gabe knew it. She’d only think he was some slime ball trying to get her into bed. Some, out-of-towner looking for a one night stand. That couldn’t be further from the truth, so he dismissed the idea entirely.

Defeated, he decided to ask for the bill.

“Hey man, I think I’m ready to settle up,” Gabe said.

“Sure thing,” he said and pulled the bill from his apron. “I suppose we will be running into each other periodically since you are here for awhile.”

“Yeah, I suppose so. I’m Gabe, by the way,” and he extended his hand to the bartender.

Wiping his hand off on his apron, he reached to shake Gabe’s hand, “Max, and it’s great you guys are here to clean up so folks can rebuild.”

As he stood to go, Gabe leaned in to ask one last question of Max, even though he wasn’t sure what he’d do with the information.

“Hey, Max? I don’t know why I’m asking, but…what’s her name?”

Max eyes sparkled as he smiled at Gabe, letting him know it was ok he asked.

“Sarah. Her name is Sarah,” and he winked, then disappeared back into the kitchen.

 

************

            Sarah McKinney put on a brave face during the day, but each night, with the setting of the sun, her heart sunk with it. Her body was on constant autopilot, going through the motions of life just to get by.

Then the Valley Fire struck, leaving her best friend Michelle, homeless along with so many others. Diving into opportunities to serve, Sarah found she was able to put her own issues aside for a bit. That’s the only reason she was here tonight. Michelle’s husband took the kids to a movie so she could have a girl’s night out.

“Wow! I almost forgot what going to a bar was like,” Michelle said.

“A few years back and this would have been normal for a Friday night,” Stacy said.

Sarah scanned the room, trying to remember what all the hype was when they partied years ago. Nearly thirty now, she felt much older.

“Holy Cow,” Stacy said quietly. “Would you get a load of that guy at the end of the bar?”

They all looked up at the man sitting at the far left of the bar nursing a beer and trying to act as if he wasn’t looking at them.

The dark hair, athletic build, and strong jaw line were very appealing, but when the others looked away giggling, Sarah looked back and his cerulean blue eyes nearly stopped her heart. He was definitely not a local.

Sarah is the only one that could act on this opportunity,” Michelle stated.

Sarah snapped her attention back to the girls. “What are you talking about?”

“You should go over and talk to him. My, my he’s a hunk of burnin’ love,” growled Stacy.

Her friends laughed but Sarah couldn’t imagine doing that.

“Geez, yes. Let us live vicariously through you Sarah. If it weren’t for Caleb I’d be jumping at or on that,” Michelle said drinking from her glass.

“No way. You guys are crazy,” Sarah said casually turning to get a second look at the G.I. Joe stud at the bar.

He was watching television but turned just in time to lock eyes with Sarah, leaving her stunned, momentarily paralyzed. His stare bore right into her like he could see and know every part of her. Suddenly, Sarah felt very vulnerable so she turned her chair to face her friends more squarely.

“This would be a great way for Sarah to get back in the saddle. And by saddle, I mean ride ‘em cowboy!” Stacy snorted a laugh.

Smacking both her friends on their shoulders and struggling to not laugh out loud and make a scene, Sarah protested.

“Oh, I totally agree,” Michelle chimed in. “God knows it would be one helluva release. Hmmm.”

“STOP IT. Are you guys insane? You know there’s no way in hell I’m gonna go talk to him. Oh my God. Quit.”

“Well you might miss your chance. Looks like he’s paying his bill,” Michelle said.

They all watched the muscular guy in tight blue jeans turn to leave and the three women followed him out with their eyes. But there was something in Sarah’s stomach and throat that fluttered. Something that pulled as she watched him open the glass door to the bar and walk out, that felt vaguely familiar. Sipping her wine she realized what it was. Yearning.

 

************

Chapter Two

Coincidence

         The weekend flew by and all Gabe managed to do was drive around the county to survey the destruction of the Valley Fire. Since he’d decided to stay, he was curious to see what kind of damage wildfires did in California. Coming from Oklahoma, he’d seen how tornados could rip apart a house on one street, leaving the homes next to it completely untouched. It would seem that wildfire could do the same.

Monday morning the crew was all back and they were working with the Valley Fire Ops Chief and Cal Recycling for assignments. The debris at each site had to be surveyed before removing any of it. The Department of Toxic Substance Control and the Environmental Protection Agency were coordinating with everyone, as well as the Office of Emergency Services. It was by far the largest collaborative job Gabriel had ever worked on.

Once Gabe’s crew was given addresses for their assignments that week, they drove up the winding roads through the thickly forested hills. When they came upon the Valley Fire’s burn scar, everything opened up due to the lack of foliage. Enormous black sticks that used to be trees felt eerie, like a skeleton forest graveyard. The ashy landscape with its thick smell of soot seemed as foreign as being on the moon. It felt dead.

This was their third week working on clean up, and Gabriel still couldn’t get over what devastation he saw. They were told they’d be staying on the sites on Cobb Mountain for the remainder of their time in Lake County. They began in Middletown, a small country town at the base of Cobb Mountain, and that town was hit pretty hard. But seeing the rolling hills and valleys of Cobb left bare, save for the blackened stick trees, was far more unsettling. Everywhere was black or gray, everything was bare, and you could see there were few routes the residents would have had to get out.

Even though he didn’t experience the fire himself, Gabe could feel the ominous sorrow of the place. It was as if the land itself was mournful. Driving the roads now, he imagined the panic of hundreds of people, trying to flee on these narrow, two-lane roads, with smoke and fire baring down on them like a dragon from Hell.

Once they arrived on Evergreen Lane, there were no homes, only foundations, fireplaces, and paved driveways as far as he could see. Crudely painted signs posted at each site by Cal Recycle and other state partner teams provided the addresses they needed.

Gabe parked and got out to look around. The pungent smell of charred wood filled his nose. On a normal Monday morning this area would have been full of busy people headed to school or work, but now it was deathly quiet.

Double checking all of the home site’s information on his clipboard before they began, Gabe pointed to where the boys were to pull in the equipment, and they all suited up in Tyvek. Before long, they’d begun hauling off the remaining debris of 14650 Evergreen Lane.

Throughout the morning they never saw another civilian car come by. Only PG&E trucks, AT&T trucks, and even the Army Corp of Engineers, but just before lunch break, a minivan drove past and parked at the top of a long driveway, just a few sites away. His quick glimpse of the girls looked familiar. He heard the soft voices of women talking as they got out of the van.

“Hey Gabe. Where ya going, man?” Barry hollered. Barry was their water truck driver and the oldest guy working on the crew.

“Be right back. Just gonna check something out,” Gabriel waved him off and kept walking, carrying his large bottle of water.

As he approached, Gabe could hear the women talking.

“I’m not sure if you think I’m crazy for even trying, but I’m glad you agreed to come look with me one last time.”

He didn’t want to intrude and realized that it was a little too late for that. Both women looked up and stared right at him.

And there she was, the woman with the incredible green eyes. Suddenly, Gabriel found himself speechless and had to shake his head to find words to explain his being there.

“Um…Hello. I uh…We are working down the street and I heard voices and thought I’d come see…well if you needed anything.

The other woman stepped forward, elbowed Sarah and extended her hand. “I’m Michelle. This is…well, was my home. My friend, Sarah here, is being nice enough to help me try to find anything left of this place that’s even remotely salvageable.”

Gabe shook her hand and said, “I’m truly sorry for your loss. My boss’s company was subbed out to help in the cleanup process for the fire and we were assigned right down the street.”

He locked eyes with Sarah then and she slowly approached Gabe, putting her hands in her pockets as she walked over.

Gabe nodded to her, “Sarah, you said? Hello, I’m Gabriel Hart.”

“Yeah, I’m Sarah McKinney. Hello,” she offered back, very apprehensive but continued to keep eye contact with Gabe nonetheless.

“I know it has to be done,” Michelle started, “but I just know I’m going to lose it when they have to haul off this ash pile. My husband is at work and we must have been here half a dozen times together already. I just wanted to try one more time. Believe it or not, I’ve found my mother’s wedding ring. My friend, Charlotte, she lived a couple of blocks from here, she also found jewelry at her place. Strange huh?”

Michelle started pacing a little, wringing her hands as she looked around her gray and blackened property.

“I guess we are just lucky to be alive. I keep telling myself that whenever I get emotional. We almost didn’t make it out. I had just come home from the store and was unpacking groceries and didn’t want to answer the phone. I let it go to the machine but the damn thing kept ringing! I heard sirens but they were off in the distance and I didn’t pay it any mind. Caleb, that’s my husband, was out working in the garage. Our kids were at his brother’s house, thank God. By the time I had three phone calls in a row I decided I’d better answer it. It was my sister-in-law and she was rambling so fast I thought something had happened to one of the kids. She said for us to get out now! We had to leave. We had to go because fire was coming our way! I had no idea what she was talking about. My husband’s brother is a fireman and they’d heard about it over his radio. Well I slammed the phone down and ran outside. I smelled smoke but that was it. I thought…they must have been mistaken. It HAD to be far from us.”

************

        Sarah wrapped an arm around her friend and rubbed her back. Michelle had lost so much. She couldn’t spare a moment to worry about what Gabriel might be thinking of all this, instead she stood close to her friend and let her talk. Tears were building in Michelle’s eyes, her hands shook, while a flush of pink crept up her neck to her face as she relived her story.

“I ran to tell Caleb and he came outside and looked too. He said we should pack some stuff and go, just in case. But what the hell do you take? I grabbed a photo album off the coffee table that had our vacation pictures from last year in it, a change of clothes for each of us…just a change. I mean, we were coming right back, right? I grabbed our dog, Sadie, and threw her into the car and got her kibble. I even fed the fish. Why, I don’t know. They didn’t have a chance. Thank God Caleb remembered to grab our flash drives.

“By the time we were loading stuff up a man was running up and down the street screaming for everyone to get out. GO NOW, he was shouting, and there was such thick smoke then, I was really getting scared. When we got to the bottom of the hill and had to decide which way to go, we panicked. What if we made the wrong choice and got stuck! The fire was baring down on us and cars were flying down but seeing was difficult and it was hard to tell which direction the fire was going. Caleb chose to go towards Lower Lake and it worked out for us, obviously. But yes, this is what we returned to after waiting for a week to come see if we had a house or not.”

Michelle wiped her tears and nervously laughed at herself. “I must seem like a crazy person to you. Here I am telling a perfect stranger my tragic little story.”

Simultaneously, Gabriel and Sarah said, “No, you are not.”

They three laughed, breaking the tension of the moment.

“Listen,” Gabe said reaching into his shirt pocket to pull out a few business cards, “I’m in town until our contract runs out. I really don’t know how long that will be because the powers that be have been unsure themselves. However, I would like to help. If you find you need extra hands over the weekend, I’m staying at the Best Western with some of the crew. They usually go home on the weekend but I’ve been staying so, if you find you could use a hand with…I don’t know, anything, just call.”

Sarah took his card and felt a tingle as their fingers touched. “The Best Western? We saw you there last Friday night at the bar, didn’t we?”

Again, Michelle’s elbow, and she was jumping in. “You know we did. He was the interesting guy at the end of the bar. Sarah noticed you and…”

Sarah reached up and gave Michelle a sharp squeeze on the back of her arm.

“Anyway, we just knew you were there,” Michelle finished.

Gabriel blushed, smiling at them with his incredible dimples and perfect teeth. He was too adorable, she thought. Dangerous.

“I won’t take up more of your time but I hope to hear from you. The guys are probably wondering what happened to me though. I should get back to work.”

Sarah just nodded but Michelle spoke up, “We certainly will call Gabriel. Have a great day and thanks for coming over.”

As he turned to leave, he gave Sarah one last flash of those amazing eyes and she watched him walk away. Oh Lord.

When she looked back at her friend, Michelle was grinning from ear to ear, mocking her knowingly.

“WHAT?” Sarah hissed quietly.

“Oh…you are in so much trouble my friend,” Michelle giggled. “It’s all over your face.”

************

        That night at the hotel, Gabe sat in a chair near the fourth floor window of his room. Three years cloaked beneath the suffocating, dark shroud of loss, left Gabe unaware of the suffering of others. Being in this place, listening to Michelle’s story, he’d felt something for the first time in three years. It was strange to admit to himself but this was the most alive he’d felt since Shelly’s death. Gabe wanted to help these people. Somehow, sharing in their pain and wanting to do something to better their situation made him feel like he found something to live for.

And there was something else. It was the undeniable feeling he got in his chest when he thought of her. Emotions Gabe thought were dead forever inside of him, welled up more powerful than he could fathom. The soft sweetness of a girl, somewhat demure, had a hold on him in only two times that he’d ever seen her. He was either going to be saved by this woman or she’d surely be the end of him. But for the first time in a long time, Gabe felt like taking a chance. When he closed his eyes that night to sleep, the last thing he remembered was the touch of her hand, and the look in her eyes.

************

OK FRIENDS… so there you have it. That’s the first 15 pages of my book. The final draft. I hope you are intrigued and want to read more. If so, then that’s exactly what I need and what the agents want to hear. If you truly feel compelled to read on, please leave a comment so when they come to my blog later, trying to decide whether or not to sign me, they will feel like this book is already selling, before it’s even published, and they will be more opt to work with me.

Thanks for your support.

The Hardest Part Is Over / My Traditional Publishing Journey Continues

I’m done on this side, turn me over. Even though I have a long haul in front of me, I feel extremely accomplished in that I set out to write a book and I actually finished one. Now comes the next hurdle. Getting it published.

First off, I have to say that I’ve learned so much about this industry. It keeps changing so fast that I have to constantly educate myself. It changes almost as often as Apple comes out with a new Iphone and that’s pretty much every six months right?

Here is the good news though, I am hooking up with really helpful people that are pointing me in all the right directions, (thus far). Other than all the wonderful people I’ve met in all my classes, and conferences I’ve attended, I mostly have to thank my editor Jen, for enlightening me on genre writing. She’s explained what publishing houses are looking for and how they will market a book. What it boils down to is you want to submit a book they can sell.

What’s next? I have a particular agent I am going to submit the manuscript to, but I cannot put all my eggs in one basket. I’d like to research about ten agents to submit to and once I have my query letter and a synopsis polished, I will send my baby out into the world and pray someone can get me a contract.

It’s not as easy as mailing off ten copies of your book and saying, “hey, wanna work with me?” You have to really research how the agent wants submissions. Some will just want the query and if they like it, then you can send off either the first ten pages, or some want the first chapter, or first three chapters. They are all different and if you sway from their requirements,… you can forget it.

My decision to try to get my book traditionally published is because even though it might take me longer this way, it will also give me a team of people helping me along. It’s so much nicer to have people to bounce ideas off of and ask questions to when it comes down to making important decisions. If I self-publish, then it’s all on me. Everything.

Still, those of you that have followed me from the beginning, back in 2015, are asking me when you can get your hands on a copy of my book. Well, I thank those of you for your patience. It’s really a process and life happens in between times. I’m just hoping my next book, (yes I’m already starting a new one), will go faster because I’ve learned what to do with this first one.

I’m very grateful to all of you for your support during my writing process. I’m also grateful to those that allowed me to interview you. I hope my romance novel will shine a positive light onto our community. I feel very blessed we have so many wonderful people here in Lake County. If my book actually sells, (positive thinking), then the rest of the world will know Lake County, California. I’d like to put us on the map in a good light of a place where you really can have a happily ever after. 

* Gratitude rock pic is from Google images.